Forgiveness. For most of us, this is something that is very difficult to do. Of course it may seem easy, you simply open your mouth and utter the words, "I forgive you", but do you truly mean it? I mean, can you honestly say that you forgive this person? Can you forgive your spouse for cheating? Can you forgive your friend from stealing from you? People always tell you that in order for you to move on with your life, you should forgive the person who has wronged you.
On numerous occasions I have heard people state that in order for you to move forward that it is in your best interest to forgive the individual that has betrayed you, who has wronged you or caused your life to be a living hell. I don't know about that. And to that I say why? Why should you forgive those whom have hurt you so deeply that it actually feels as though a knife was stabbed through your heart? For some, it's hard to forgive. Let's face it, there are some individuals that you honestly forgive and they treat your act of forgiveness like a joke. They repeat the offense over and over again. Really, how much can a person constantly forgive another. However, for those of you who can honestly and truly forgive someone, I say kudos to you. For that is truly a blessing. The ability to absolutely forgive someone and actually mean it.
For the most part, I don't believe in forgiveness. Of course this depends on the circumstance. If someone bumps into me, of course I will forgive them. Like most, it's the big issues that I have trouble with forgiveness. That's why I don't say it. I know many will proclaim that the Lord will want you to forgive. That you should not keep your anger bottled up until it consumes you. I agree with that. However, I am sure that the Lord doesn't want me to look the person in the eye and utter the lie of forgiveness. He would want me to be truthful. He wants us to be truthful. So why should we say we forgive someone when we really don't mean it.
I have been listening in on various conversations and hear people give the advice to forgive. Forgive that person so the issue will no longer consume you, they say. Forgive that person and you will feel better. Says who? It's true that sometimes you become so angry at the person who has wronged you or caused you distress that you actually do become bitter, stuck and you cannot progress and move forward. This is something that we don't want. We all deserve some form of happiness in our lives. That's why I advise people to let go and move on. RELEASE IT. This of course takes time. It doesn't happen overnight.
I wholeheartedly don't advise or believe in telling someone to utter the words of forgiveness UNLESS they can boast that they mean it. Forgiving a person doesn't release you from the situation. You have to release yourself from it. I do believe that we should forgive ourselves. We should and must find away to let go and release the anger or hurt that the individual has caused us. By merely telling someone that you forgive them does not release your anger, your heart, your feeling. Just because an individual has caused you much pain (example, a spouse), doesn't mean that you don't love them. Nor does it mean you have to forgive them right away, if ever. However, you need to get to a place in your life where you can accept what has happened and move forward. With that being said, we should not allow or continue to allow people to walk over us and assume that we will constantly forgive them.
We, as an individual have to take it basically one day at a time. Focus, pray, and meditate. Release and let go of the situation and move forward. You owe it to yourself to move forward and progress.